Jun. 19, 2019

HELP

 

The epicurean delights of Yorkshire have left me for once stumped for words.

English supposedly offers more choices than more succinct tongues. Please suggest existing or new words to describe the following feelings.

1. You have almost finished eating something wonderfully delicious. There is just one mouthful left. We need a word that combines various feelings. First is the regret that the exquisite experience is almost over. Next is the inhibition you feel about the waiter’s and fellow diners’ feelings of disgust, if you order a second enormous plateful. Lastly, you suffer extreme anguish from the realisation that you are unable to fit a mouth-watering desert into your distended stomach.

2. Although enjoying your own choice from the menu, you felt that a fellow diner’s selection was also enticing. Now it appears on the table their order was clearly superior.

You notice that they are about to leave the most attractive morsel on the plate. The restaurant is very upscale and full of diners who look like your mother. She was a stickler for the correct holding of cutlery and good manners. This inhibits your natural inclination to harpoon the morsel with your fork and gobble it down. You sneak a peek around the other tables. The matronly women all seem very alert and are looking in your direction.

How do you describe your feeling of utter desolation and anguish, as the waiter removes the plates?

If you wish to avoid such torments and inadequacy of expressing yourself, avoid Betty’s Tea Rooms. We will be visiting one for the fourth time in two weeks tomorrow.